I just feels like writing for these few days and his comment finally pushed me.
My very dear brother, Aiman, whom I met few times in a year are going back to Indonesia next Wednesday. He just bought a smartphone, his very first proper smartphone. Oh the joy! Then one things lead to another. We discovered it can't connect to the wifi and all our effort can't fix it. His Youtube was all funny and we can't uninstall it though i tried to download the APK.
We bought it in Puchong and has been away so these few days we can't post it to have it changed. Today, the screen has cracked. It cracked deep and need fixing for another RM200. He has been stressed previously and now he is just like DONE. Did i mention the phone itself only cost RM320. Pfft.
I felt like crying.
My Muslim also went to his tahfiz yesterday. When we were heading back, he has his goofy smile and was desperately want to go out since he has some time before his teachers was looking for the students. He was afraid and Aiman was convincing him like a bad influence he is that Muslim should really just go. He can't go out during their day off since he is still small so this is like this one sweet escape chance for another few months. He is 15 years old for heavens sake but I understand the restriction. He can be quite childish. My own little brat. I miss him.
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| that charming girl is Atun. |
One thing about them is that we didn't really have much time together for as long as i remember. We don't understand how far their tahfiz upbringing has affect them and well they were boys. Being a boy may be the one reason why I may not be able to understand them better in the first place. I can't stop having this feeling that I always need to be there to help them because they might not know and i need to show how and simply to protect them.
I wonder how suck it would feel if i have my own kids to care for.
I was thinking ways to get a good smartphone for Aiman. It really is not that desperate since the stuff was illegal anyway. He might be able to use it for like once a month But it would give him joy. Though i can't stop questioning why Allah gives this. Most importantly how he felt about this.
Aiman is charming. But he can be an annoyingly stupid person. That is the fun now isn't it? He was looking at this kayu sugi and asked whom is it. It was mine and has been gracefully unused. He asked me to use it saying it's good for me. He found his small book having this manzil reading and asked me to read it with good tajwid and tartil because by reading it better would hold better chance for the success of it. He is growing up for sure. He have this little accident and have some cuts of his elbow and sprained his ankle a bit. I was the last to notice when he suddenly say he is sorry for my scooter. I was having this cleaning frenzy and he kept on saying thank you when no one else ever do.
So yeah, God help me, You gave all this signs but i want to try to get a good smartphone to give his this little joy. Allah is what we thought of.
He was looking at this luggage to bring his stuff and tries to pick it up and pull it over. Suddenly he looks in the mirror and say he want to be at full spirit to continue his studies.
The most beautiful things about my siblings is that we know all of our issues and we swallow it, embrace it and freaking work it out.
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